Grey Area Relationships: When Enough is Enough!

This is a response to relationship post where the young woman in the couple was struggling to make it all work and keep the relationship afloat:

It’s best to be aware of the self because like Dr. Phil or Oprah said the other day,”Nobody can make you lose what you already have.”

At first, when I heard them say this I thought yes they can. I can have myself and lose me in a relationship, but thinking about it now, I think well, wait…. I am sound in mind and spirit, I don’t lose myself, I am always aware of where I am and what I’m doing… although the saying is a cliche term used way to often… I am who I am. I’m me; I’m here; I’m not and have never been lost. What I did in finding a bad relationship is find something I didn’t need and tried to make it fit into my world.

Some men, no matter who the woman in their life is at the time, are going through shit. Shit smells! It stinks to the point of inducing nausea, it makes you not want to eat.

If you stepped in shit, you wouldn’t say, “G-d this is awful let me change the way I dress to make it be better or let me try to look at it from the perspective of someone else to make sure it stinks. You wouldn’t say maybe if my ass was 15 lbs lighter, the shit wouldn’t stink, and why is that? It’s because shit stinks, no matter what is done and when someone else is going through it or stepping in it, you’d be damned to stay in the same room as them, allow them to wipe it on you or allow them to convince you that it’s because of you, that shit stinks on their particular shoe.
This is men when they’re going through shit and unfortunately we as women are ruminators when it comes to our relationships, and we’ve been trained to be caregivers who should do all we can to fix our troubled relationships, like it’s our job to save it and make it work.

The responsibility, we take into our own hands, alone, like we are the only one’s who are there to serve a purpose in maintaining the functionality of the match.
We are not to take that sort of responsibility, because it is fruitless and dangerous to the psyche.

Tell me something, when is the last time someone stepped in shit and you said, I know that really stinks and if you walked around like that the rest of your life, it’d be horrible for you and me, so let me bend over backwards and gag to wipe it off for you. It’s my job and our relationship is doomed if I don’t.” ? I’m sorry when is the last time someone did that for you?

Maybe your mom or dad did this for you before you were 6 years old, but guess what, not after, and if you decided to walk around with shit on your foot as an adult you parents who gave you life would say, I love you, but I don’t want to be with while you are going though this shitty phase cause it stinks, and you sure as hell better not stepping foot into the house wearing those shoes.

If you really love someone or care for them, even as a friend, you tell them the truth, “That shit on you shoe stinks, you need to fix that, but I’m not touching it!”

And if they respect you, value your friendship, or treasure your opinion,and they are logical, responsible adults, they will handle their problem themselves and see you when the mess has been disposed of.

If a person in your life doesn’t feel that way or act that way, they should no longer be a person in your life.

Nobody wants to be friends with the smelly kid in the class and rightfully so, they would make everything that is supposed to be good in life, just stink.

What do you do with the trash cans when they smell? Exactly what you should do with a guy/girl who puts you in the grey when s/he is stepping in shit that causes life to stink…..

DUMP THEM!!!!!!!!